Can't sleep 3:55am central time

Have you ever been in bed feeling like nothing can get you to sleep?

Oh yes, that's me. I never believed my boyfriend when he told me that he suffered from insomnia. It's pretty terrible. I am not currently suffering from it, but tonight I can't get to bed. This uneasiness made me realize what an unbeliaveable number of us take advantage of sleep. It's really a gift.

So sleep world, or those who CAN sleep and have lovely nightmares, or NOT (giggles). Seriously, those who can't, go see a doctor. 

http://sleepfoundation.org/sleep-disorders-problems/insomnia

Family

I often think that moving away from my family, for many reasons, will be good for me. I have to leave my nest and explore horizons that my eyes dare to see. But here and there, I have a feeling of remorse or even fear, that if I am not near my family, they will deteriorate without me. How selfish. How dare I think that I am some tough, unbreakable chain that keeps my family together? That's selfish.

Time and time, though, I find that even my presence will not change the decisions my loved ones will make. I often feel scared for them, when instead, I should welcome the changes that will come. I should love them for who they are and for the challenges they will face. I should rather love the simplicity of moving on.

I love you all. I remember the little ones when they were still in diapers, resistible to sleep! I remember their little bald heads and fat cheeks. I remember summers with my brother and sister chasing me down the house when I had stolen a favorite toy from them. I remember rolling down brushy hills a million times, and feeling an extreme itch all over afterwards. I will always cherish these memories.

It's time to let them fly. I have to let you go, but I love you. I always will. 

Feeling the Full Time

Wow!!

It's been so long since I visited this site, but it is very much needed right now!

I have recently been struggling with balancing my life. I recently obtained a full time job, and am responsible for a large part of my living expenses. It feels great to have a wonderful and rewarding job, don't get me wrong, but it's a little hard sometimes.

I guess, I thought I would be over this already since I've been at my job for 4 months now. It looks like it takes longer than what I assumed. The latest struggle I've been dealing with is my sleep schedule. I can't quite figure it out; I can't wake up in the morning! I guess my question as I lay there is: "Why do I need to get up?"

It's hard.

I've also been drinking coffee EVERYDAY. It's kind of out of control. You know I recently started a new eating lifestyle, I moved into a new apartment in October, my parents may divorce soon, and as I am writing this, I realize these are very recent changes in my life.

Is this why I feel so overwhelmed!?

Feel free to post comments :)